There’s little doubt that finding the love of your life would be a wonderful thing. But those seeking love often sabotage their efforts by believing several, common myths.
It’s much more challenging to find true love if your beliefs are inaccurate. Examine these myths and see how many you currently believe.
Clear your thinking by examining these common love myths:
1. Your perfect partner will find you. There’s no evidence to suggest that fate plays a role in finding your ideal mate. The more responsibility you take for your life, the more likely you are to find a successful match.
• Keep your eyes open and be prepared to act when the right opportunity comes along.
• Who do you think will have more success: the person that goes out with a few new people each month that meet his criteria? Or the person that stays home on the couch and declares that he’ll leave his love life in the hands of fate?
2. Playing hard to get is the way to a man or woman’s heart. Those that like to play games or have a lot of self-confidence can enjoy the chase. But most of us are attracted to those who show a genuine interest.
• That doesn’t mean professing your love after the second date. But waiting a week to return a phone call will leave the other person assuming you don’t have any interest.
3. Love will happen naturally. Love and relationships are hard work. It’s true that most great relationships are very easy in the beginning, but the beginning doesn’t last for long. One famous relationship expert stated, “Love isn’t a game. It’s a blood sport.”
• What if your natural environment doesn’t have any suitable prospects? Love will never happen in this case until you step outside of your natural environment. Take control of your life.
4. A great relationship is always 50/50. It will hardly ever be 50/50. Your partner will get sick, have a bad day, suffer a midlife crisis, and have the occasional bad mood. So will you. During those times your partner isn’t at his best, you’ll have to do more of the heavy lifting. Hopefully, the favor will be returned in the future.
5. All the good men and women are already taken. Many of the good ones are taken, but many of the good ones are still out there. There are plenty of great people looking for someone just like you.
• The pickings can get a little slimmer as you get older, but they’re out there. Unfortunately, they’re also more likely to be at home as they get older. Make yourself available by having an active life. Someone else will have the same strategy.
6. You’ll know in the first couple of dates if they’re the one. It’s easy to be excited during the first six months of a new relationship. This honeymoon period feels good, and your partner seems perfect.
• The next six months are a more accurate test. Those quirky behaviors that seemed so charming start to lose their charm. Real life starts to creep into your fantasy world. If you’re still excited after six months, you can feel optimistic that you may have found a good match.
If finding love has been an exercise in futility, perhaps your belief system is getting in the way. When your beliefs are accurate, you can create an effective course of action. Be proactive and keep a positive attitude. You never know where your perfect partner is hiding.